CAFFEINATED THOUGHTS(Mental-Health-Edition)

I can not believe there is a full moon tonight.
I am psyched-up about the new year.
I am not stable, I am INSANE, but have self-control, and am heading down the path to; self-MASTERY?

Before heading out the door tonight, I said that I have to start keeping track of the full moons, being an Aries, with a mental health condition, full moons drive me EXTRA-insane for about 48 hours, and I been doing therapy journaling, and was going to jot down and google when the next full moon was, and ended up mind-BOGGLING as I'm driving upto Walmart in the misty dew, breathless as HOLY MOLY GAWD, A FULL FREAKY MOON=PSYCHIC(dogs are barking in the neighborhood like CRAZY, not kidding)

Leave me ALONE,
everyone!

BLURRY CONFESSIONALZ: As I am overcoming dextromethorphan substance abuse(for 4 1/2 years), which is a major dissociative, that is theorized to connect you to the other dimentions, which I have dissociative identity disorder(multiple personality disorder), but once I gain order I will just be a 'Master Of Dissociation'. I MET JESUS CHRIST ON DXM!(boy the truth is HARSH)

BLURRY CONFESSIONALZ PART 2: The thing is... I don't give a f@#$ what anyone thinks about me, but GOD(we have to monitor language now on google and youtube :( ). I've been battling what could be called as "chronic masturbation" for years, but it's not in a sense, it's something that has been happening to me every 2 to 4 weeks for a really long time, but I have overcome this cycle with my substance abuse and "chronic masturbation" that makes a person unable to be a productive member of society BAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA CRY ME A FUDGING RIVER WE ARE """"""ALL"""""" messed up and insane in some way. This is my ugly!!!!!!!! I don't hurt anyone, and compared to how evil this world is, I'd say I'm a pussy cat.(but cats kill birds, so, I guess I'm just really INSANE). But what I was really trying to hint at is that having dissociation as a tool of survival, everything I have been through, in some really insane way that I wouldn't advise, dextromethorphan(a dissociative agent), has been a treatment for me, that I got hooked on on accident when I had a cold 4 1/2 years ago, when I went to buy nyquil and remembered a documentary on the news that I seen years back, and remembered the main chemical, and tried it, and tripped, and now I am trapped in a dissociative trip for the rest of my life, which I feel is perfect, and the 1st movie that I felt was a message from GOD, 'CONSTANTINE', nobody really notices that his character is on cough suppressant, and the film is filled with suicide, and committing suicide after converting to every religion on film and then go to hell to defeat "Lucifer" and become A REBEL DEITY BAHAHAHHHAHHha(I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Maybe?)

You know how much stuff I can absolutely not talk about?
But this is a huge step admitting this type of stuff, that I never really fully admitted on social media before. But I don't think my truth can get any more worser.
And like that moment when Harley Quinn to that fire diablo guy, "OWN IT"

I think that is enough.
I expressed enough.
I'm off seroquel,
and quitting caffeine by the new year,
taking GABA for my anxiety(and ADHD),
and drinking chamomile for nerve tonic,
but tonight, had this headache, so I drank tea all night, instead of taking some headache pill.
Went to an 'emotions anonymous' meeting the other day. GOD, it was gawd awful(I wonder if awful is the opposite of awesome?).
I compulsively spent 210 dollars, and compulsively bought the emotions anonymous book because I was nervous, and my hands were sweaty(hyperhidrosis disorder), and I slimed the peoples hands because they hold hands in a circle=not for me.

I feel I will be ready to get a job by new year,
I have a team of therapists on my side.
I have a positive affirmation on a hat that I hope will be my positive affirmation for success in the new year.
"""Catch Me If..."""(is the affirmation)